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Nicole Ratcliffe, devoted mum to six-year-old Sofia and Alyssia, who is two, says she ‘felt like a failure’ when her eldest daughter didn't sleep after being told ‘newborn babies sleep all of the time’.

“After an emergency C-Section, infections, and having a baby who didn't sleep, I found myself spiralling down into a dark hole of sleep deprivation, anxiety, frustration, resentment and feeling like a failure,” she said.

“There didn't seem to be anyone who understood and I kept being labelled as 'an anxious mum'. People say it is a phase, the baby is teething and it will get better. It didn't get any better.”

Nicole Ratcliffe who grew up in Bispham and now runs a sleep consultancy business called Baby2Sleep. Here she is pictured with daughters six-year-old Sofia and two-year-old Alyssia. Pic credit: Louisa Mayman

The stress of the situation put strain on Nicole’s relationship with her husband, and her marriage was soon at breaking point.

The 41-year-old added: "By the time Sofia was five months old, my husband and I were having marriage counselling. We were thinking it must be the relationship that was wrong, not our situation. It turns out it really was our situation.

"All the mums at baby groups tried to offer advice, but nothing I tried worked. It just made me feel even worse about Sofia’s poor sleep and my poor coping mechanisms. I just felt I should be doing better and I was failing her.”

It was when Sofia was eight and a half months that Nicole heard about a sleep consultant from another mum and decided to give it a try.

Nicole, pictured here with baby daughter Sofia, said: "This picture was taken when things were really bad, but the image portrayed to others wasn't the reality. I think it's really important for people to realise that just because someone looks happy and looks to be coping, it doesn't mean they really are."

“We didn't have the money but it was either try this or divorce, and a divorce costs a lot more. Within a week we had our evenings back, and my husband and I started rebuilding our relationship. Sofia was sleeping so much better. It was far from perfect, but it was a million miles away from where things had been. It started to feel like there was hope."

Nicole, who grew up in Bispham where she attended Westcliff Primary, Bispham Endowed Primary School and Montgomery High School, now lives with her family in South Manchester. She set up her baby and child sleep consultancy business – Baby2Sleep – five years ago after retraining with the lady who had helped them. Nicole now offers a range of online support guides, courses and one-to-one help.

“I wanted to help others. This was the start of what has been five years of learning, practicing and realising just how broken the support system is for parents - and working on trying to change this.

“Don't keep thinking it's a phase and hoping it gets better. A baby who is overtired, struggling to fall asleep and stay asleep due to high cortisol levels isn't just going to 'figure it out', they need the parent to help lower those cortisol levels and start to support them to sleep. Please know you are not alone, even if you feel you are the only ones struggling, because you aren't. Just because someone looks like they are coping on the surface, it doesn't mean they are coping underneath.”

Visit www.baby2sleep.co.uk, email [email protected] or search Baby2Sleep on Facebook.

Mum who found herself 'spiralling down into a dark hole' after newborn wouldn't sleep now helps others after retraining as a Baby2Sleep coach