'From the first call, we just clicked': Lancashire woman tells of joy brought by befriending service during the pandemic

A string of debilitating health problems has left the 55-year-old confined to her home in Preston for almost two decades.

Just as the pandemic struck, Linda also lost her mum - a devastating start to what would prove a difficult year, even for someone so accustomed to stoically withstanding all that life could throw at her.

While she still had the support of her carers, Stepdad and a longtime friend, there was no doubt that the Covid crisis left Linda in need of additional companionship. And she got it - in the form of a weekly phone call from someone who started out as a stranger.

She did not think twice before accepting an offer from the Lancashire Volunteer Partnership to be contacted by one of their growing band of befrienders who had come forward to help vulnerable or elderly residents in the county who were feeling cut off as a result of coronavirus.

Linda says that the regular calls from fellow Prestonian Katherine (who did not want her surname published) came at “just the right time” to give her a lift during dark days.

“From the day she first phoned, we just clicked. We have such a good chat and a laugh - and before you know where you are, the time’s gone.

“But, more than that, she has taken a real interest in me and made me feel as though she genuinely cared.

“The list of things that I have got wrong with me is endless and Katherine has been really concerned when I’ve told her how some of my problems have got worse lately - and it’s lovely to have that,” Linda explains.

Every befriending pair will, of course, be different and the conversations will naturally be shaped by the personalities and circumstances of those on either end of the phone.

While the physical horizons of those receiving the calls are likely to be more limited than the volunteers making them, Katherine believes that the chat can actually be stimulated, rather than stymied, by the contrasting lives of those engaged in it.

“Sometimes I feel like I end up talking too much, but I’m pretty good at that,” she laughs.

“Maybe that’s why Linda enjoys it, because I can talk about anything.

“Everybody’s experience is different, people’s childhoods are different - and it’s just nice listening to Linda’s stories of how things have changed from her generation to mine,” says 34-year-old Katherine.

Meanwhile, for Linda, her calls from Katherine offer a window into a world of which she might otherwise know little.

“I’m as interested in her as she is in me - and I love hearing about her week and what her family has been up to. Of course, I have my carers - including one who has been with me for 10 years and is my absolute rock - but this is something new,” says Linda, who had jobs as a chef and a carer before she fell ill when she was not much older than her phone friend is now.

Within just a few weeks, there was a normality to their weekly natters that belies the necessarily artificial way in which they began. From recommendations of TV programmes to suggestions about what to have for tea, theirs has been a friendship forged, not forced.

However, Katherine is convinced that conversations like hers with Linda are achieving something far more profound than superficial pleasantries.

“Isolation can have a really negative effect on people and sometimes just cracking that can make a real difference to their lives.

“I get a lot out of it when Linda answers the phone and I can hear in her voice that she’s quite down - but then before long she is having a good giggle with me.”

For Linda, who often reflects on her previous life - “I’d love to be working and driving again” - Katherine’s calls are a welcome focal point for the week.

She was even moved to pen a poem about how much she values them - and her new friend.

“I’d recommend it to anybody of any age who is on their own and has no friends or family - because if they find somebody like Katherine, they’ll be so pleased that they’ve done it.

“It makes me feel so good - I do look forward to the phone ringing.”

COULD YOU BE A VOLUNTEER CALLER?

The Lancashire Volunteer Partnership is looking for phone befrienders across much of the county. The service is strictly telephone-based and volunteers are not permitted to make in-person visits to the people they call.

A disclosure and barring service check is also required.

Lancashire County Council's cabinet member for health and wellbeing, Shaun Turner, said the scheme offers an opportunity to help someone "who is feeling alone, isolated or lonely."

"Our volunteers just need to be over 18, have a bit of spare time each week to befriend someone - and they really need to enjoy a good chat.

"Volunteers are carefully paired up with the person that they will be calling, so that there are initial common interests. Often, people just want to talk and are grateful for the opportunity to interact with someone.

"Having someone to chat with, who has time to listen to them, makes a real difference to their quality of life.

"It's a great way to get to know someone and to make that difference from the comfort of your own home.

"Often, our volunteers become very good friends with the person, and build genuine lasting relationships and companionship," County Cllr Turner said.

For befriending and other volunteering opportunities in your part of Lancashire, please visit: lancsvp.org.uk/opportunities