Look at it this way - May 10, 2013

The Mount at Fleetwood
The Mount at Fleetwood
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Fifty things to do – at
56 and three quarters

I’m a fractious sort of person but fractions are not my strong point. So the headline’s not quite right.

Really it should say 56 and five-sixths because I’m 57 next month. Now I’m not touting for gifts or cards, not from my three remaining readers after the fall-out from Thatcher-Gate some weeks ago.

But my point, non-decimal, is this ... If I wanted 50 things to put on my bucket list the very LAST organisation I would ask for help is the 
National Trust.

Not judging by their 50 things to do by 11 (and three quarters) list for children.

I can’t remember what I got up to in the top class at primary school but I know if someone had turned up and suggested I spend a pleasant Sunday morning cycling the Asparagus Route I’d have probably told them to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.

Yet that’s one of the top 50 treats for prepubescent kiddies courtesy of the esteemed National Trust.

It’s also at Formby which seems to be as close to the Fylde as the National Trust’s regional treat list gets.

They throw in hill rolling at Speke Hall which you can do at the Mount, Fleetwood, if careful to avoid dog walkers, flower beds and the wall at the bottom. We used to go hill rolling at the side of Amounderness Way when young. The traffic queues are such there today I often think of nipping out for a quick tumble ... but it might distract the other drivers.

Lancashire, let alone Blackpool, doesn’t get much of a look-in in the 50 things to do list for kids ... even if we offer the definitive bucket (and spade) activities . Yes, I know “swim in the sea” (anywhere but here) carries a health warning locally but in my day youngsters were of sterner stuff. Seeing other people’s poo float past never put us off playing pooh sticks.

The National Trust is too sniffy for me. I once visited Beatrix Potter’s Hill Top at Far Sawrey in the company of a large rabbit. Or rather a small postman clad as Peter Rabbit for a new postage stamp promotion. As Japanese tourists mobbed Peter “Labbit” we were asked to leave. No Pottering around there.